True Hipster Stories

I'm on the F train yesterday coming home from work sitting next to the unique and amazing beardo the magnificent (see pic). iphone-check. Hipster glasses-check. Various other hipster attributes-check, check and check. A Puerto Rican dude and his girl get on the train. the Hipster slides over to make room and a conversation ensues:

PR: yo is that a guitar?
Hipster: no its just a large bag. I don't carry my guitar anymore. A few months ago I was carrying it in the street and someone punched me in the face and ran off with it.
PR: Damn they jacked you up like that for your guitar?
Hipster: Yes they did. Since then, I leave my guitar at home.
Chika: damn, that's NY for ya.

Yes indeed, Rosie Perez.

I was sitting next to this unique victim man-child.