An old friend forwarded me this yesterday and I thought it was a joke. Unfortunately, it is real. Levi's Jeans, the orginal, most authentic jeans, have sold out to the filthy Hipster and are now marketing jeans to men who want to be women who want to be gay men.
These jeans are so tight that they are actually inside this model's vagina. The statement you are making by wearing these pants is: "I am a female". But as a straight man, I would rather wear a dress, at least that would be comfortable.
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| For only $69.50 you too can hop on the Hipster bandwagon. |
Over 150 years ago Levi Strauss riveted rough wagon canvas together and sold that shit to miners who had yet to tame the frontier. He is now lending his name to a pair of jeans that can only be worn by someone with such a horribly emasculating self-defeating personality disorder, that they cause its wearer's testicless to be crushed as flat as the asses of their pasty midwestern Meghan girlfriends, destroying any chance of procreation. I can't hate this, as it can only be described as natural occurring malthusian population control playing out before our eyes.
OH SHIT! Levi Strauss WAS a Hipster- Check out that facial hair! But no, sorry, that facial hair was NOT ironic back in 1874. Lucky for Strauss, he died in 1902, over a hundred years before his famous Jeans suffered the humiliating bastardization into trendy tight pants for wannabe homosexuals.
How did people look up words like "malthusian" before the mac dictionary shortcut?
ReplyDeleteHAHAH Nope, I dont do mac. I cames up wif ma big werdz all on me own.
ReplyDeleteSince I work across the street from hipster ground zero I see this everyday. The "look" to sport this winter is skinny black hipster jeans, flannel shirts and a oversized wool hat with strategically placed hair peeking underneath. And yes, this look is unisex. I want to pull a curb-stomp a la American History X on them, and thats what I want to do to just the girls.
ReplyDelete-Gay Fish Yo
When will it stop?
ReplyDelete